I’m a bit of an A-type personality, and have issues with beginning things if I don’t think they can be done properly. Many afternoons, I breathe a sigh of relief as I lay III down and his eyes stay closed, and then I retreat to the living room and just sit. I get stuck in this paralysis of not knowing what to do next. There’s so much to be done, how do I decide where to begin? I should do dishes, but what if the noise wakes him up? I could do laundry, but in order to feel comfortable folding it on the floor, I’d need to vacuum first, which also might wake him up. I could clean the bathroom, but if he wakes up in the middle of my cleaning, then I won’t get to finish. I also want to rearrange my closet, and I’m in the process of moving my work area from our bedroom to the built-in desk in the hallway (which Lloyd vacated to move his work space into the garage).
So I sit. And I think about all the things I should be doing, but am afraid to start because I know I can’t finish them before he wakes up. Usually, I end up deciding I deserve a snack break or something, and I watch some tv on hulu. Then my previous arguments for why I can’t begin anything become even more pertinent, as it’s now been an hour since he fell asleep, so the chance of him waking up increases.
I’ve really got to get over this all-or-nothing attitude. So today I made an effort. I watched one short episode of 30 Rock while eating my lunch, and I dove into the pile of papers and receipts that were on the desk. I got to work for about an hour, and managed to get a few things organized. I went through some boxes in the living room that I wanted to move into my “office,” but didn’t quite finish, so now my living room is a bit of a mess, and my computer is still in the bedroom, but I made some progress. I didn’t waste my afternoon.
Most times, a little bit of effort is still better than no effort at all. I’m not magically going to have 8 hours of time to myself with no children and a strong drive to organize and clean my entire house (although if anyone wants to come babysit…), so it’s useless to sit around waiting for the perfect time to do things. With kids around, the perfect time is all the time. Being a mom means learning to juggle—find the moments when one kid is entertaining the other and you can sneak into the next room for even 15 minutes to wash a few pans (although I’m pretty sure the best way to keep a kitchen clean is by cleaning up after each meal, but I lose all motivation to clean after cooking). This ADD-style approach to cleaning (ADHD, whatever) is really obnoxious, and difficult to get used to, but I guess it’s all just part of the parenting territory.
Tags: cleaning, time management
The Daring Kitchen
